Flavor #7 - Learn German and Visit Germany

Learn German and Visit Germany - Me

"Why German?" This is the question most people ask when I tell them about my latest Flavor. I suppose most of them are wondering why I don't pick a language more widely used in America, like Spanish; or why I wouldn't want to learn a language that was more pleasant on the eardrum, like French.

The answer is not a very simple one, because truthfully, I'm not even sure why. For some reason over the years I've developed a fascination with the country's history and formed deep connections with those who either grew up there, or by some twist in life, lived there for a time. It seems that my path constantly intersects with opportunities to know more about Deutchland, so when I was picking a language for my 31 Flavors list, it seemed very natural to:

Learn German and Visit Germany.

My opinion of Germany wasn't always as romantic as it is now. When I was young, it seemed that whenever I saw Germans in a movie, they were usually Nazis and the language was being barked in some harsh way; Indiana Jones was always fighting them, and the VanTrap family barely escaped from them to the Swiss Alps. Even when I was older, if there happened to be good Germans in a film, I almost forgot they were German because they usually didn't have the German dialect.

Subconsciously I'm sure that I thought of the language as angry, and the people who spoke it as "the bad guys."

Studying the Holocaust in junior high didn't help much. I remember the Diary of Ann Frank, as well as other stories of the concentration camps, chilling me to my bones. I vividly recall a nightmare where I was frantically searching for my younger sisters only to hear that they had been taken to the gas chambers. I awoke in an awful panic and stumbled through my sleepy fog to their bedroom to make sure they were safely asleep in their beds. I remember being so relieved that it was a dream, and going back to bed thoroughly convinced that things like that only happen in bad countries.

My first year of college, it finally occurred to me America wasn't the center of the universe. I began dabbling in foreign cinema, and became quite fond of British and French films. I wasn't until I returned home for the summer, that I watched my first German movie: "Run Lola, Run." My younger sisters and I were were sucked into Lola's 20 minute race to save her irresponsible boyfriend from desperately holding up a grocery store. The movie literally is a race because Lola very rarely stops running the entire 70 minutes. The movie is full of fun quirks, like an animated Lola charging up and down flights of stairs, brief encounters with strangers unravelling a flood of foreshadowing snapshots, and three different endings. The action is underscored by a pulsing beat with lyrics like, "I wish I was a Person with Unlimited Breath; I wish I was a Heartbeat that Never Comes to Rest," and only stops for a couple brief scenes, including flashbacks with Lola and Manni. It was during one of these flashbacks, with Lola and Manni lying in each other's arms, whispering intimate insecurities about love, that I remember thinking, "Wow, this language is beautiful."

A few years later, I left my roots to explore the Chicago stage. I remember the first time I met Katherine. I was the new girl at church, sitting quietly by myself, when a tall, beaming face approached me. She was charmingly inquisitive and I liked her almost instantly. Quickly I learned that she grew up in Germany; her parents were both American and had moved there after they were married so that her father could pursue his career as an opera singer. Katherine had recently left her roots behind to move closer to her older sister, Elizabeth, who was tutoring in Chicago, and to study acting at DePaul University. The fact that we were both actors gave Katherine and I an unspoken understanding and we quickly became friends. Her English was so flawless that I would often forget she had spent her whole life in a foreign country; until she'd say something about the cereal she had as a child, or break out into German while talking on her cell phone.

It was around this time that I took a more mature interest in the Holocaust. I poured over books like "Schindler's List," and "A Man's Search for Meaning" as well as documentaries and movies on the subject. These heavy stories, inspired many emotional phone calls to my family where I tried to express how much I loved and appreciated them. I seemed incurably fastened on the injustice and grief, and the thousands whose lives had been torn apart. Then somehow, in the middle of all my horror with this country's history, my intrigue switched to the country itself. I wondered about the German people, the individuals living there, and how they felt about this black mark on their country's history. My childhood was filled with 4th of July fireworks and the Pledge of Allegiance. When September 11th happened, millions of windows all over America proudly displayed the stars and stripes. Katherine told me that growing up, she had never experienced that sort of pride.

I felt sorrow for the horrible things that had happened there, but I also felt sorrow for this country that seemed to still be repenting of its past.

Over the next few years I formed other friendships with German ties including a brief long-distance relationship with Jason, a structural engineer living in Philadelphia, who had served an LDS mission in Germany. Sometimes in our late-night conversations I would request he speak to me in German. As the complex vowels and consonants tottered off his tongue, I could visualize Lola and Manni whispering to each other in the dark.

My relationship with Katherine and her family grew as well. I have lovely memories of choreographing silly skits, bawking Christmas carols, and listening to her father's beautiful bass voice cascading over my church congregation.

When Katherine moved away from Chicago, I became very close to her sister Elizabeth, the wonderful woman I've talked into taking this trip with me.

It was through these amazing people that Germany became more to me than the place where the Holocaust happened or the Berlin Wall came down. It became Katherine and Elizabeth's home. It became Jason's treasured two years abroad. I can feel how much they all love Germany, and my love for them has translated into love for their country as well. I'm excited to learn this language and visit this place so dear to their hearts.